Thinking of myself less
I am tapping into the discomfort of waking up earlier than a finished sleep would make me get up. I sense the grogginess that comes with this discomfort and try to sleep again. I have woken up at the 6th hour of my 8-hour intended bedtime three days in a row.
I wonder why that is so. What if there's just a slight modification that is needed to enjoy complete sleep?
My tired body and mind want something, and I don't know what. Maybe it's a good dose of workout. Yes, that is something I have missed the last few days. Correlation, causation.
Hey, wait. Let me interrupt this line of thought. I don't want to think about myself too much here - that is not the point of this blog. Journaling makes it rewarding to indulge in self-talk (and self-pity). But this is a public-facing blog - it is written for 'You'.
Okay. However, I am not putting up a performance here. No. Nada. Nopes. This is a sacred corner. It is not a social media website (where maybe it makes sense to perform for the 'audience' (or the algorithm)).
I just want to communicate.
Okay. Is this the first draft of the post, or shall I take another go when I feel more at rest, when it is easier to think of something nicer to say?
Nah, today I want to acknowledge this struggle. (I am, after all, breaking out of the mold of a journal entry writer to writing for You.) Maybe then it'll lose its sting.
If you would like to talk, please send me a note.